About Me |
MOST PEOPLE ARE AFRAID OF HAVING A "NEAR LIFE" EXPERIENCE
You have to systematically create confusion, it sets creativity free.
Everything that is contradictory creates life.
-Salvador Dali
YOU MUST ALTER YOUR PERCEPTION OF YOUR PLACE IN THE UNIVERSE,
BECAUSE THE UNIVERSE IS SMARTER THAN WE ARE.
Humbled By Hubble
It is our RESPONSIBILITY to be the right role models and examples for today's youth;
to provide intelligent and construction direction whenever possible;
EVEN when not wanted or requested.
We MUST show them by OUR example.
If you are going to tell people the Truth, you had better make it funny, or they will kill you.
**-Oscar Wilde-**
Myspace Layouts - Myspace Editor - Image Hosting -- TRANSZENDENT, SHAMANISTIC, BAT COUNTRY --
QUESTION AUTHORITY!!
GOD HAS NO RELIGION!!
THE WORLD CONNECTS THROUGH MYSPACE!!
I am a strange and wonderful Cosmic Surfing Alien Humorist;
Just your average whacked out Zen monkey, which is both a blessing and a curse.
"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is." Yogi Berra
"If you do not raise your eyes you will think that you are at the highest point." Antonio Porchia
"Reality" is for people not cursed with self awareness.
If I could tell you or show you what I truly understand, it would scare you to death, or to enlightenment.
Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it.
Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumoured by many.
Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books.
Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.
Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations.
But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.
Gautama Buddha
In my life:
I have become the Christ;
I have met and fought the Devil(evil);
I have gone insane - maybe still there;
I have died;
I am an active mystic;
I understand the consciousness of Earth;
I am the keeper of the archives in Mt. Shasta;
I am incredibly happy and exquisitely alone.
If quantum mechanics is right, then the world is crazy.
He is a good story teller who can turn men’s ears into eyes.
I suspect most people have a very low tolerance for reality.
HELLO, Hello, hello, is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
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My Interests |
THE NEXT REVOLUTION IS AT HAND, SO GET WITH IT!!
"A mind that is safe, secure, is a bourgeois mind, a shoddy mind."
Krishnamurti
ME AND MY COSMIC TWIN DAR
Thanks to all Aliens for their participation towards the enlightenment of Planet Earth.
Ways of Knowing - http://www.waysofknowing.net/whatsnew.html;
JeffKreisler.com and ComedyAgainstEvil.com;
VideoRanch - www.videoranch.com/; www.myspace.com/videoranch
AMAZING ART -- http://www.jonstrongbow.com/
see friends -- G-tigerclaw
http://www.g-tigerclaw.com/
see friends -- Markus Frede
http://www.markusfrede.de/
see friends -- Eric Sorenson
www.espwave.com
see friends -- SPatriot
see friends -- Joshua Krause
the art and design of Blaine Fontana
http://totembookmedia.com/home.html
see friends -- Johan
DEEP TREATMENT MASSAGE, HEALING;
http://kerryshrodemassagetherapist.com/
Moondog
WORUZ -- see friends
"If a tree doesn't fall in a forest, and no one hears, does it make a sound?
If the forest doesn't exist, what are the guitars made of?
If I played a guitar with no strings, could I achieve Perfect Intonation?
If I played a guitar with no neck, could I achieve Perfect Tuning?
If I played only a sound-hole, would the Buddha breathe in and out?"
My incredible friend and spiritual brother -- Bill Ostrie
http://www.ostriesculpture.com/quotesandlinks.html
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I'd like to meet:
do not let strange creatures in your house
Most certainly, I'd like to meet any other cool aliens living on Earth.
AND very personable earthlings who have a great sense of humor.
AND it goes without saying, Jim.
Jim Henson Tribute
Add to My Profile | More Videos |
Music:
THE VENTURES, PAUL CURRERI, DJANGO REINHARDT, TONTO's Expanding Head Band, jazz, rock, bluegrass, classical, heavy metal, Latin, Keltic, slack key, Flamenco. Brand X, Hot Tuna, the ORIGINAL Fleetwood Mac, Mountain, Woody Guthrie, Dan Hicks, Bob Marley, Super Session, Murray Perhia,
Sabicas, Paco Pena, FRANK ZAPPA,
STEVIE RAY.............................JIMI........................
. ALBERT
Paco de Lucia, Mozart, David Grisman, Tony Rice, Cal Tjader, Mongo Santamaria, Pink Floyd, Malcolm Cecil, Love - Forever Changes, The Beatles, The Fugs, Bela Fleck, Duke Ellington, Keef Hartley, John Hartford, John Renbourn, Los Lonely Boys, Andres Segovia, Joe Satriani, Mannheim Steamroller, Miles Davis,
JOHN COLTRANE......................THE DOORS - OF PERCEPTION,
HOT CLUB SANDWICH,
Stan Kenton, Blue Oyster Cult, Scorpions,
Wish Bone Ash, Dave Brubeck, The Grateful Dead, Blue Man Group, The Ventures, Buddy Holly, Cab Calloway, Artie Shaw, Benny Goodman, Les Paul, Oingo Boingo, The Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band, Pete Seeger,
SHPONGLE................FLOWRUSH...............INFECTED MUSHROOM
Elvin Jones, Hoyt Axton, The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band, Ry Cooder, Roy Orbison, Oscar Lopez, Will Ackerman, Leo Kottke, Chingon, Chet Baker, Joe Pass, Oscar Peterson, Tribal Tech, John Handy, Chick Corea, Steve Stevens, Larry Coryell, David Lindley, The Mothers of Invention,
PETER GREEN
CALIFORNIA GUITAR TRIO.................DAN HICKS AND HIS HOT LICKS
JOHN JORGENSON...................FOO FIGHTERS
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Movies: I have WAY too many favorites, but here are a few:
Uncorked, Grosse Pointe Blank, Casablanca, The Maltese Falcon, Kung Pow, Cheech and Chong's Nice Dreams, American Beauty, Six-string Samuri, Big Trouble, The Thin Man series, The Croupier, Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein, Bubba Ho-Tep, Get Shorty, Silverado, Dead Man, The Life Aquatic, Pirates, After Dark, The Rutles, Monty Python's - Holy Grail & The Meaning of Life, Scotland PA, John Cusack in anything, Film Noir, The Count of Monte Cristo, Dr. Strangelove, 2001, The Yellow Submarine, Robert Altman, George Lucas, Stanley Kubrick, Inside Man, |
Television:
The Prisoner, Brisco County Jr., X-Files, Ernie Kovacs, Steve Allen, Jeeves and Wooster, The Twilight Zone, Laugh-in, Mythbusters, Twin Peaks, Max Headroom, Scrubs,
the original SNL, Home Improvement, PBS Mystery series, The History Channel, the late Richard Jeni, George Carlin, FRAGGLE ROCK, Jim Henson Hour, Steve Allen, Star Trek, Lovejoy, Rocky and Bullwinkle, Fractured Flickers, Moonlighting,
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Books:
Mind into Matter; Wakefield; Jules Verne; The Way, The Book and anything else written by Alan Watts; William Blake; e. e. cummings; T. S. Elliot; Mark Twain; Oscar Wilde; Zen To Go; Raymond Chandler; Krishnamurti; Aldous Huxley; What is Your Dangerous Idea?;
Alan Watts: http://www.alanwatts.com,
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Heroes: BE A SIMPLE KIND OF MAN
LAUGHING!!
ALL YOU NEED IS IN YOUR SOUL!!
PETE SEEGER, JONATHAN WINTERS, Krishnamurti, Walt Disney, Jim Henson, Bill Hicks, my extraordinary friend Mark Hicks - Gravity is my Enemy, HST, George Carlin, Ernie Kovacs, Django Reinhardt, Mahatma Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Alan Watts, Bob Marley, Sandy Koufax, da Vinci, Bill Ostrie, the Dalai Lama, Jonathan Winters, Paul Frees - THE Voice, Samuel Clemens, Will Rogers, Frank Zappa, Stan Freberg, Martin Luther King jr., The Firesign Theater, Arthur Lee, Ed Sanders, The Fugs, Ken Kesey, David Harris, Albert Einstein, Dale Velzy, JOAN BAEZ, ANGELA DAVIS, Gertrude Stein, Woody Guthrie
LONG BOARDS RULE!!
GREG NOLL/DALE VELZY
Rain O, Rain O
Fall upon the Earth again
Make it good and fill the rivers
Fill the pools
Quench the thirst of every fool and every sage
And every sour soul who's lost so much they do not know their need.
Chilliwack
----SPACE FOR CONTINUED NEW ANNOUNCEMENTS----
Taking a GIANT at full tilt boogey --OH MY GOD!!
Jeff Clark -- The MASTER of Mavericks
My former girlfriend before she grew a beard and changed her name to Rusty Sprockets. I loved this outfit.
Me in a former incarnation, or was that last night?
My new job
Availability by appointment ONLY!!
I'm also available for parties.
Buried at PhotoCasket.com
And Guided Treks through the desert
ME; the wifey(slightly under-dressed for the occasion)
the in-laws
AND the kids
Right in the middle of Jeb's solo, he painfully relived that morning's mistaken application of Icy Hot Sports Cream for Preparation H.
STUPID DESIGN
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My Background and Lifestyle |
| MaritalStatus: |
Married |
| Ethnicity: |
Other |
| SexualOrientation: |
Straight |
| Hometown: |
The Universe |
| Religion: |
Other |
| Smoker: |
Yes |
| Drinker: |
Yes |
| Children: |
Undecided |
| Education: |
Grad / professional school |
| Occupation: |
Alien |
My Pictures |
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My Blog |
The Way |
The way my friend is not difficult, if it is truth you wish to see, then hold on opinions for or against anything. To place what you like against what you dislike is the hanky-panky of the mind....
Posted by Tonto F Schwartz on Sun, 22 Apr 2007 05:25:00 PST |
My Friends |
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Ernie Kovacs, Django Reinhardt, GEORGE CARLIN, Bill Hicks, KOYAANISQATSI, 10th Dimension Alan Watts, Free Your Mind, Dr. Hunter S. Thompson, the Fugs, JOHN (OSFA*), Richard Pryor, Bob Marley, Movie Classics, ♥ Dalí ♥, Mark Twain, Zane Kesey, The Bonzo Dog Band, Surfadelica, HAVING A GRATEFUL DAY, Lewis Black, Penn & Teller, Father Guido - ON HIATUS -, Esoteric Aural Fantasies, Bill Ostrie, Paul Curreri, SteveO, Psyckederrick, DUDESS, bella, Judge Mental says thanks brothuh JFC!, OZ, Sparky, Dimensional Traveler, Line Dancers on Acid, Stoney Tony: Miss Mary Jane Is My 1 True Love, Ricky Jay, Tao, The Monty Python Foot, World Longboard Surfing Association, ZU, LuAnne, Slayer From Hell, "RANCH DRESSING", Edward L. Norton - Denizen of the Deep, Virginia, The Surf Coasters, *Sunny Girlfriend*, Garry, monica, B-Movie Babe, Pee Wee Herman, moebanshee paranormal
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Tonto F Schwartz's profile has been tagged with the following keywords. Click a tag to search for profiles with the same tags.
myspace layouts, antonio porchia, zen monkey, myspace editor, kenmore washington, blessing and a curse, yogi berra, salvador dali, many generations, question authority, role models, religious books, self awareness, humorist, life experience, oscar wilde, hubble, theory and practice, enlightenment, elders
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United States
Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
