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's Profile

Age: 33 years old
Sex: Male
Location: Austin, Texas
Country: United States United States
Last Login: Jun 5, 2009 (157 days back)
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About Me

I am a stand up comedian. See my stand up. See it go. See it at ROOFTOPCOMEDY.COM/ANDYRITCHIE . See it at EFFINFUNNY.COM/ANDYRITCHIE . See.NEW VIDEO:

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

A mentally retarded billionaire that knows he can get away with anything and takes full advantage of that.

My Background and Lifestyle

MaritalStatus: Single
SexualOrientation: Straight
Hometown: Riffington, Jokesylvania
Religion: Taoist
Occupation: Science Dropper

My Blog

Lunar Eclipse: Not Spectacular

Wow, The Moon turned brown. Thanks for the heads up, science. Why don't you rinse the sand out of your collective science vagina and expose the truth about Outer Space? Admit that we've been dril...
Posted by on Wed, 20 Feb 2008 20:44:00 GMT

BOYCOTT BLOGGING!

Seriously, no more blogs.  Why should all of your awesome ideas be consumed for no profit?  Listen, I read blogs, and it's as if liquid diamonds are evaporating and filling all seven of my o...
Posted by on Thu, 07 Feb 2008 23:14:00 GMT

Who's Afraid Of Virginia Tech?

They say that the kid that killed all those people wrote some pretty disturbing plays.  In hindsight, some people say they should have seen it coming.  They would have done somethi...
Posted by on Wed, 18 Apr 2007 21:02:00 GMT

Even My Psychic Sold Out! Good Gracious!

Last night I got my palm read.  I asked what was in my future, and the lady predicted longevity, good health, and ice cold Pepsi.  She also had a Pepsi headband on.  What a wa...
Posted by on Mon, 11 Dec 2006 21:37:00 GMT

Hey Skateboarders!

Skateboarding is NOT a crime!  Neither is taking a shit, but when you're on the steps of the State Capitol, it's "Use your best judgement" time.  I realize you get a thrill from running from...
Posted by on Fri, 01 Dec 2006 23:59:00 GMT

Me N' M'Joke N' Esquire

Silly me, I was in the right place at the right time and a man from Esquire Magazine was super nice with it in the December '06 issue.  Here's the chunk: At the improv, I heard Ahmed Ahmed, the A...
Posted by on Mon, 27 Nov 2006 20:58:00 GMT

300 Blogs And Runnin'

First of all, the World Series sucked this year which really hurts my case that baseball is fun to watch.  The Tigers were pathetic as a team, but the the errors put me over the edge.  The e...
Posted by on Sat, 28 Oct 2006 16:16:00 GMT

In No Way Do I Condone The Brutal Murder Of RFK

RFK was a great man in my opinion, and so for me to say Sirhan Sirhan was a great writer is a joke, ok?  You should see the humor in it though, I mean Sirhan didn't even use proper punctuati...
Posted by on Sat, 08 Jul 2006 16:33:00 GMT

This Ain't Me

If you have read my blogs, I am sorry.  I don't even know what to write about, and so I use this outlet as a toilet for bad ideas and nonsense.  I just want you to know that I real...
Posted by on Sat, 08 Jul 2006 16:21:00 GMT

A Tale Of Rediscovery

I'm sitting here the morning of July 4th, doing nothing, when I see a wallet on the coffee table.  I was like, "Who's wallet could that be?  We didn't have any company last night, some ...
Posted by on Tue, 04 Jul 2006 13:54:00 GMT

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taoist religion, stand up comedian, dropper, billionaire, austin texas, science
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